Coming of Age in the Aquarian

Roundabout

Journal Entry Date: 28 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Be forever cautious among the worldly, alert among the apathetic. With this attitude you will soon leave others behind, since this will mark you as aware, while others will be seen as idle." --Awareness, verses 29 & 30 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.283)

Brought to eye/mind today: Reminded today of the times in my life when I really wanted something and didn't get it, then found out later how high the price would have been. The right thing in due course is wisest.

Thank you, Anchorage planners, for the roundabout.

Journal:

• It took the City of Anchorage 2 years to complete the roundabout on Dowling Street and driving that road was difficult (I was involved in two accidents while it was being built) while it was being built. But I must admit--the roundabout works well and is actually fun to drive through.


• Startled by Squeaker rushing across the room and jumping at the window. Since we were upstairs at the time, I'm quessing he was after a bird. The window prevented him from catching the bird and also from falling two stories.

The deepest mysteries are in beginnings and endings

Journal Entry Date: 27 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day:
"In the beginning there was
Neither naught nor aught;
Then there was neither
Sky nor atmosphere above.
What then enshrouded
All this teeming universe?
In the receptacle of what
Was it contained?"

--Rig-Veda, 10th Mandala

Brought to eye/mind today: When I really want something, I see myself as the donkey in cartoons with a carrot dangling in front of his nose. The harder I chase my desire, the faster it recedes.

Thank you, Lord, for pieces falling into place.

Journal:

• Sometimes we don't know we're dealing with a mystery until we get into the details of explaining how or why something happens.


• Looking around on the web for code, mainly javascript, to use in the website redesign.


• I play a lot of Freecell, but it's not as bad as it was.

We're all simians here

Journal Entry Date: 26 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "It is good indeed to honor all Buddhas and their disciples, to follow one's practice and to live in harmony with other aspirants. This will give you great merit as you journey onwards." --The Buddha, verses 194-195 & 196 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.281)

Brought to eye/mind today: Lately seeing samples of the Sime/Gen concepts from Jacqueline Lichtenberg's fiction. For example, when our evolving predecessors began eating meat--a Sime-like (or is it simian?) behavior, their height increased.

Thank you, Lord, for a tasty Sunday dinner.

Journal:

• During meditation caught a glimpse of myself pontificating--"the world according to Marge..."


• Read TIME magazine a fair amount today.


• Also painted a little--doped gel medium with a pearly additive.

The bird circling a tree

Journal Entry Date: 25 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "The second point I wish to make is about a particular characteristic of argumentative method that is common to all the writers of this book--perhaps of all Jungians. Those who have limited themselves to living entirely in the world of the conscious and who reject communication with the unconscious bind themselves by the laws of conscious, formal life. With the infallible (but often meaningless) logic of the algebraic equation, they argue from assumed premises to incontestably deduced conclusions. Jung and his colleagues seem to me (whether they know it or not) to reject the limitations of this method of argument. It is not that they ignore logic, but they appear all the time to be arguing to the unconscious as well as to the conscious. Their dialectical method is itself symbolic and often devious. They convince not by means of the narrowly focused spotlight of the syllogism, but by skirting, by repetition, by presenting a recurring view of the same subject seen each time from a slightly different angle--until suddenly the reader who has never been aware of a single, conclusive moment of proof finds that he has unknowingly embraced and taken into himself some wider truth.

Jung's arguments (and those of his colleagues) spiral upward over his subject like a bird circling a tree. At first, near the ground, it sees only a confusion of leaves and branches. Gradually, as it circles higher and higher, the recurring aspects of the tree form a wholeness and relate to their surroundings. Some readers may find this "spiraling" method of argument obscure or even confusing for a few pages--but not, I think, for long. It is characteristic of Jung's method, and very soon the reader will find it carrying him with it on a persuasive and profoundly absorbing journey." --John Freeman (Jung, MAN AND HIS SYMBOLS, Dell Publishing, p.x)

Brought to eye/mind today: That which I set out to find was already at hand.

Thank you, Lord, for good and timely information.

Journal:

• Dreamt--just before waking:
  I'm helping a black girl who is a co-worker establish her case for keeping her job. We are students working for IMS at UNR as field service techs, maintaining and repairing PCs and printers.

  She and I go the the sub-basement in the Physics building, where the research labs are, to find evidence in her support. There are library stacks, full of books, in a cave-like setting. I find something in the dirt and show it to her.

  Seque to:
  It's finals time at school(1) and I haven't gone to class or taken a test all semester. I dread seeing my grades with all the F's and know I will lose my job at IMS because they require active standing as a student. I wonder where I'll find a job in Anchorage (though I'm going to school in Nevada).

  (1)I've dreamt this a number of times before. Usually I'm running up the wide steps of a campus building to take the final and full of dread, because I haven't studied and missed many classes. The class is usually a language, Latin or German.



• Found it was snowing when I got up and it set me in fret mode--the yard's not cleared of the remnants of construction, nor is everything battened down for winter.


• I planned today to explain why I'm not a Buddhist, although I admire Buddha and his teachings very much. Will talk about it another time, because this entry is so long.


• Naegling, my older computer, is ailing. One of the fans sounds ready to go. Cleaned all the fans--the one in the power supply was pretty grungy. Cleaned it with alcohol and lubed it with silicone spray. It sounds much better.

A bird circling a tree

Journal Entry Date: 24 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "There is a time for the truth to be revealed to you. If you don't believe it, then it is your loss." --Buddhacarita (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.279)

Brought to eye/mind today: Concept about a bird circling a tree in foreword to one of Carl Jung's books, probably MAN AND HIS SYMBOLS.

Thank you, Lord, for a quick trip home on a Friday at 5:00P.

Journal:

• Woke thinking about the desk that's in storage costing $27.00 a month and how money is tight right now and why am I paying for this? I should get it out and store it in the yard wrapped in plastic.


• When I went to the door to do my breathing exercise this morning, that pesky long-haired calico cat was there, meowing to come in. Is there no peace?

Can one really control life?

Journal Entry Date: 23 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "When has your life dramatically changed as the result of some seemingly random external influence? How much do you feel in control of the course of your life?" (Gregory Stock, THE BOOK OF QUESTIONS, p.64, question #68)

More questions: Can one really control life? Does the idea of directing one's life sound more realistic?

Brought to eye/mind today: The writings of Alice Bailey are coming to mind lately. Particularly her astrological concepts with respect to the signs, especially Leo. Also her book THE RAYS AND THE INITIATIONS. Her work sometimes seems to go around in circles, but contains shining nuggets that engage and tantalize the mind's eye.

Thank you, Lord, for blinds done.

Journal:

>Took time off from work to finish cleaning the blinds, screens and windows before winter closes in. Got them done and feel good about it.
>It seems my new deck is a cat magnet. Went to the door and happened upon an unknown cat sitting there, looking out at the world.

Virtual particles

Journal Entry Date: 22 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "It [is] known that empty space is bubbling with "virtual particles"-- pairs of particles and antiparticles that spontaneously appear out of nowhere, then annihilate each other and vanish. That happens so fast the particles can hardly be said to exist." ("Hawking Cries Uncle," TIME Magazine, Aug.2, 2004)

Questions: Who knew this? And how do they know it? Do we have evidence from space? Or from cloud chambers?

Brought to eye/mind today: Remembering yesterday--driving to work, encountered two drivers who crossed in front of oncoming traffic. Think they didn't look to the left before pulling out. Everyone was lucky.

Thank you, Lord, for the Permanent Fund Dividend (distributed to Alaskans yearly).

Journal:

>Today was a mostly uneventful day. At work trying to code ASP.

Late, later, latest

Journal Entry Date: 21 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "...reciting epic Greek poetry such as Homer's ILIAD and ODYSSEY actually seems to be good for the heart--at least according to a new study by a team of European researchers. It all has to do with breathing patterns and their relationship to cardiac rhythms. It turns out that reciting poetry--especially verse like Homer's that follows a specific rhythm called hexameter--makes an excellent breathing exercise...The result [is] an increase in the synchronization of certain cardiorespiratory patterns that are believed to be favorable to the long-term prognosis of cardiac patients..." ("Does Poetry Make the Heart Grow Stronger?", TIME Magazine, August 2, 2004)

Brought to eye/mind today: [You're] "late." I was five minutes later than usual arriving at work (we have flex time; I flex it) today. It seemed I heard the word late a couple of times. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't.

Thank you, Lord, for this workday done.

Journal:

• An undertone of emotion today. Personalities showing strongly, mine included. One going on vacation, so others must fill in; no one wants to spare the time.


• Started a digital workup of the painting I'll be doing next. Still not done with the current one.


• At this writing, realized it's the Fall equinox.

Reality bites

Journal Entry Date: 20 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: On the road of life...if you're moving so fast you leave everyone behind, life is a blur, detail is lost; if moving too slow, you get bogged down in detail and begin to stagnate.

Brought to eye/mind today: Looking for images of robed figures at Google--
>"robed figure" yielded a couple of pages
>"hooded figure" was about the same
>"monk" yielded mostly Buddhist monks
>"Medieval monk" yielded mostly tonsured ones
>"Obi Wan" yielded a lot (>15 pages)
Are we defined by what is popular?

Thank you, Lord, for a dose of reality.

Journal:

• At work told a co-worker I'm doing a weblog. Another co-worker chimed in with "How interesting do you think your life is?" I wonder: Does it matter?


• Searching for sources of glass microbeads--an art supply--again. Every year or so, I look again and fail to find any online. Am getting the right name down, though.

A narrow space

Journal Entry Date: 19 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "In the noble eightfold path, what is Right Intention? The intention to be free from desire. The intention not to harm or be cruel. --Digha Nikaya (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.274)

Brought to eye/mind today: A narrow space in a large mass.
 OR 

Thank you, Lord, for so many ideas and images to paint.

Journal:

• Rainy today, so relieved of outside chores. Read mostly, painted a little (very little) and began sketching and mentally laying out new painting, working title "Three Unknowns"--three robed figures.


• Watched "The Score" with Robert De Niro and Marlon Brando. It had a good vignette of a computer nerd.

Five flashing dots

Journal Entry Date: 18 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "The true holy person has a mind so still that the most wonderful peace can be experienced. As mundane existence is considered, the joy of truth wells up in the heart of one so practised." --The Holy Person, verses 373 & 374 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.273)

Brought to eye/mind today:
1. Five dots flashing at different rates--hypnotic.
2. Mel Gibson in "The Singing Detective," bald and wearing glasses. His outrageousness was subdued, but still in evidence at times.

Thank you, Lord, Squeaker, the cat's, love and companionship.

Journal:

• Still trying to grasp blogshares. The concept seems simple enough, but the mechanics elude me.


• Worked on an effect I want to use on my revamped website. It works nicely (the flashing dots). A plan for the site is beginning to come together.

But is the pizza really free?

Journal Entry Date: 17 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Speak the truth, don't give in to anger, and be generous. Follow these three principles and be wise." --Anger, verse 224 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.272)

Brought to eye/mind today: A piece of artwork containing roughly cylindrical shapes rising from a common ground. Edges mostly soft, predominant color blue. (Can't find the URL again.)

Thank you, Lord, for new views.

Journal:

• Meditation: At the axis and bodily aligned with it.


• Lately at work a number of big job with a lot of repetition:
  >More than 1000 CAD drawings to convert to PDF format (took 25 hours)
  >Approx. 83 Excel pages to copy with form buttons and scripts (not done)
  >Hundreds of intranet links to verify after recovering from a failed HD (~3 hours)


• Free pizza at work


• MLF started installing Linux on this machine--a birthday or Mother's day gift being fulfilled.

False alarms can be useful, too.

Journal entry: 16 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Live one meditative day well, with freedom, strength, and wisdom, rather than a hundred years in laziness and bondage." --The Thousands, verses 112 & 113 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.271)

Brought to eye/mind today: From a scene in "Without A Trace:" "I don't want to be married to you anymore." First thought: a least it's out in the open. Then, would I react? Answer: yes.

Thanks to whoever set of the false alarm at work today. While walking past the fire alarms was excruciating (due to both pitch and volume), the fresh and much-cooler air outside was a welcome alternative to the heat and stuffiness inside.

Journal:

• Find my anger at MLF is waning.


• Mentally writing disclaimer #2: religion vs. spirituality. Important to this blog's central topic--the Aquarian Age. So may extend it to an article. Will work on it in a new category--"Work in Progress."

Out, Out Damned Canker

Journal Entry Date: 15 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "What do you think is better: to seek for a partner, or to seek for the Self?" --Buddhacarita (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.270)

Thanks to Kit the cat for her fine company.

Brought to eye/mind today: Termination dust on the mountains (Alaska-speak: first snow of the winter) is staying this time.

Journal:

• During meditation:
  >Heard neighbor outside raging at a dog for peeing on their tree. Then she got in her truck, peeled out, and her tires screeched at every corner.
  >Remembered a conversation with a new acquaintance, met at First Friday last, about the Buddhist concept of cankers and extinguishing them by playing the desire out. (My interpretation; I'm not a Buddhist.) Before remembering the conversation, it seemed I dreamed it.
  >MasterMind visualization: a bursting, loving, shining energy overflowing heart, breaking boundaries, and flooding the Earth.
• Watching CSI Miami, got a taste of CSI New York.
  

Title:SPAM, SPAM, wonderful SPAM...

Journal Entry Date: 14 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Half-hearted attempts at your practice will allow delusion to continue entering your life. Only complete focus will stop delusion from entering, and destroy old patterns." --Majjhima Nikaya (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.269)

Thank you, Lord, for cooler days

Brought to eye/mind today: A sere world, still.

Journal:

>Heavy frost this morning with ice on the puddles. Summer was so sunny and hot this year, felt overloaded with it. Glad to see autumn, but heading into winter is still hard.

>Checking webpage links at work after the webserver was rebuilt.

>Banned IP 65.75.139.90. Ms. KatherineStuart0@lycos.com--if that's the person's real identity--insists on advertising drugs here. I choose not to assist.

>Now averaging about 250 spam messages a day.
"The term spam is derived from the Monty Python SPAM sketch, set in a cafe where everything on the menu includes SPAM luncheon meat. While a customer plaintively asks for some kind of food without SPAM in it, the server reiterates the SPAM-filled menu. Soon, a chorus of Vikings join in with a song: "SPAM, SPAM, wonderful SPAM, glorious SPAM," over and over again, drowning out all conversation." --http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spamming#Etymology

>My bank refused to make a payment that I set up electronically at the company's site. Recently I learned that they mail electronic payments to companies in Alaska, where I live. Beginning to research other banks.

Temper, Temper

Journal Entry Date: 13 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: A state of being maintained beyond its natural lifespan putrefies.

Thank you, Lord, for day done.

Brought to eye/mind today: blood drawn or just an accident?

Journal:

>A burst of temper from MLF resulted in a broken bowl. I cut my hand picking up some of the pieces. The water in the bowl struck the bookshelf.

>Cancelled my dental appointment because I just didn't want to deal with the logistics of getting there on time.

>MLF went out this PM.

A Lesson Twice-Learned

Journal Entry Date: 12 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "What would induce you to give up life as you know it and face the unknown? Were people in previous centuries more adventurous than we are today or was it simply harder to avoid risk and adventure? How much does affluence make people complacent and averse to risk? (Gregory Stock, THE BOOK OF QUESTIONS, p.204, question #193)

Thank you, Lord, for a good laugh.

Brought to eye/mind today: Community (It has been coming to mind quite a bit lately.)

Journal:

>Thinking I should check out blogs about astrology and ones about community and find one that is humorous.

>Cleaned a window, its blinds and screen. Got in a fight with the screen when trying to re-seat it. It just wouldn't fit--used a screwdriver to wedge it in, a rubber mallet to hammer it in. Tried it upstairs and the one upstairs downstairs. Broke off the spring clips because they were so annoying. Then tried putting the bottom edge in first and it fell into place. Worse yet, after it fell into place, I remembered learning this lesson before.

Three more windows to do before winter sets in.

Life Lab 101

Journal Entry Date: 11 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Does it really matter whether someone else is innocent or guilty? Only worry about yourself and your own actions." --Amagandha Sutta (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.266)

Thank you, Lord, for what is needed being received just in time.

Brought to eye/mind today: A self-portrait with mottled face by Pierre Bonnard. Also Mark Rothko's work.

Journal:

>Added category "Life Lab 101" to blog. Thinking of adding a disclaimer about religion.

>Ordered herbs from a new company--good prices and the brands I prefer. We'll see how it goes.

A Grainy Day

Journal Entry Date: 10 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: To live as a social being in the company of other humans requires some form of conformity. (To communicate both must speak a language that is mutually understood.) Sometimes the price in time and effort is just too high.

Thank you, Lord, for a moment of community with my fellow exercisers at Curves.

Brought to eye/mind today: The logic of printing on both sides of a paper folded once (a folio).

Journal:

>Woke worrying about finances.

>The whole day just felt grainy and disconnected.

Tricky Tripod

Journal Entry Date: 9 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "The novice who knows he or she is just that, has a small amount of wisdom. But the novice who thinks he or she is wise, is a fool." --The Novice, verse 63 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.264)

The trick is to know when you're no longer a novice.

Thank you, Lord, for clear autumn light.

Brought to eye/mind today: My eye keeps tripping over the tripod I put in the corner to remind me to take a picture of the new deck.

Journal:

>Looking for blogs to connect to. Like A Mindful Life and Drollery. Really like New Life Emerging(but the print is awfully small).

>Made a tasty, spicy stirfry for dinner, using lots of ground ginger (no fresh ginger on hand).

>There's a CSI marathon on TV--going into overload.

Artifacts/Artefacts

Journal Entry Date: 8 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: Mystics say that the world is an illusion, but when damaged, I bleed. How can this contradiction be resolved?

Thank you, Lord, for a body that works well.

Brought to eye/mind today: Artefacts/artifacts

Journal:
>Got to my desk at work and was reminded by my computer of the class that started 20 minutes earlier and that I was supposed to attend. So I trotted off with many apologies on my tongue.

>Received a $10 gift card from Lowe's; I don't know why.

>While waiting for MLF to return with vehicle, so I could go, leafed through book FISHERMAN'S WORLD. Bought it particularly for one picture of a fish diving into the water, but there are many intriguing water effects shown. The fisherman who wrote this book has an artist's eye.

>On the way to exercise delayed in turning right by a black sedan making a U-turn. I think it was the same one I encountered yesterday.

>Received the following notice via email:
"You were forced to sell 3 out of the 18 shares you own in Against the Flow for B$41.63 ea. (3x the current market price) because James Coberly restructured the blog using a Muse (artefact)."

According to Merriam Webster's, 10th edition (Zane Publishing, Inc. , 1997, 1996)
artifact
1a: something created by humans usu. for a practical purpose;
esp : an object remaining from a particular period

b: something characteristic of or resulting from a human
institution or activity <"self-consciousness
. . . turns out to be an artifact of our education system,"
Times Lit. Supp.>
2: a product of artificial character (as in a scientific test) due
usu. to extraneous (as human) agency

artefact: chiefly Brit var of artifact

Against the Flow

Journal Entry Date: 7 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Live in accord with nature, and if you are detached there will be no wanting in your life. This will give you liberation. --Anguttara Nikaya (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.262)

Thank you, Lord, an unexpected gift.

Brought to eye/mind today: A quote giving Van Gogh's credo: "If one wants to grow, one must thrust oneself into the earth." Not sure it worked for him.

Journal:
> Received a much-needed check from MLF.

> In attempting to deliver my car payment found myself caught in five-o'clock traffic. Had a near accident with a black coupe sitting crosswise in my lane, waiting for an opening in the opposing lane. There was a turn lane, which the driver chose not to occupy. Put up a mental sign: Idiot Zone.

>Thinking about internet culture--its potential for world community and its current expression--mostly commercial. Maybe that's how we begin.

>Began an association with Blogshares. Gifted with 18 blogshares in Against the Flow; don't know why or what to do with them. Still learning.

Nobody Rides for Free

Journal Entry Date: 6 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "It is no good reciting the scriptures if you don't live your life by them. It is better to know a few texts well, to overcome desire and live your life properly. This will give you a wonderful life." --The Opposites, verses 19 & 20 (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.261)

Thank you, Lord, for jobs accomplished this weekend.

Brought to eye/mind today: A conscious effort on resisting distraction

Journal:
>Published blog article, "Visualize Peace," and resumed making journal entries--hopefully on a daily basis.

>Vacuumed and cleaned fridge.

>Bumper sticker seen: "Forget about visualizing peace, visualize using your turn signal." My favorite--"Get in, sit down, shut up and hang on." One popular in the sixties--"Ass, gas, or grass--nobody rides for free." (Well, maybe not a bumper sticker, just sometimes brought up in conversation.)

Visualize Peace

Here is an exercise for the purpose of promoting peace.

He is the Kwisatz Haderach.

Journal Entry Date: 5 Sept 2004

Thought for the Day: "Be restrained in your actions, and live the four noble truths. This will lead you to Nirvana. This is a true blessing." --Mahamangala Sutta (Crosweller, Buddhist Wisdom Daily Reflections, p.260)

Thank you, Lord, for clarifty w.r.t. (with respect to) finances

Brought to eye/mind today: a single drop of water and the waves it causes spreading outward.

Journal:

>Medit: Area at right front quadrant of brainpan that sometimes hurt may be an ancient scar; worked on healing it. "This is momentous." Choked when sounding "om."

>Watched "Dune," produced by Dino de Laurentiis, again. At one time it was my all-time favorite movie. But after reading Herbert's books, and seeing where this Savior, --the Kwisatz Haderach--led his people, the sense of destiny it communicates has lost its glamor.